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Over my lifetime, there have been rapid advances in digital technology. I remember getting my first phone at the age of 12, primarily for communicating with my family members. Before this, I enjoyed playing online video games, sending and receiving emails from my grandparents, and chatting with our overseas friends via Skype.
I can appreciate that while there are benefits to having online connections and spaces, these platforms are unfamiliar territory for people of all ages and all neurotypes. The media and research space have sent conflicting messages about online spaces and whether to impose screen time limits, playing games with your children, and so-called “screen addiction”. This can leave parents and caregivers feeling overwhelmed and confused.
As an Autistic ADHDer (AuDHDer), I recognise that online platforms have provided me with meaningful connections, opportunities for learning, and self-regulatory outlets. I can also acknowledge that it did present with its challenges, some of which are still ongoing for me as an adult. I hope that we can approach screen use with a neurodiversity-affirming neutral lens to better understand how online spaces can be helpful for our Neurodivergent children and young people, the potential challenges that may be encountered, and how we can support safe and considered access to online spaces.
The benefits
With visual processing being a relative strength compared to my auditory processing, online platforms allowed me the opportunity to absorb information at my own pace. The online programs gave me a way to consolidate the topics covered in school, whilst removing additional cognitive and sensory overload. More research is emerging in support of using video modelling and online platforms to assist children and young people to learn about history, spelling, mathematics, and collaborative problem-solving skills (Harrison & Rowling, 2025; van Asselt, 2026).
As I approached the end of primary school and faced numerous major transitions and changes, online platforms assisted with self-regulation. Upon reflection, I was likely experiencing Autistic burnout during this time. Suddenly, engaging actively in my other passions and interests became incredibly effortful and tiring. Paradoxically, while feeling overloaded, I was also likely understimulated, creating an ongoing sense of restlessness and decision paralysis. Screen use provided me with a predictable and calming outlet when I did not have the energy to engage in other replenishing activities. Minecraft was, and continues to be, a wonderful way for me to explore my creativity, problem-solving skills, and maintain social connections. After meeting friends at high school who also loved Minecraft, we were able to continue to play together after school and use the in-game chat to communicate. I still play online with friends to this day.
Online gaming also opened opportunities for me to connect with people with similar interests, plus to discuss topics related to game development histories, lore, and mechanics. In the online social groups I co-facilitate for Autistic children and young people, I continue to be in awe of our participants’ knowledge. These spaces enable everyone to interact in ways that work for them, including individuals who may use communication methods other than oral speech.
It is important to note that screen use is not necessarily limited purely to video gaming or social media. This is why I find quantifying ‘screen time’ difficult. For instance, I use my iPad and iPhone regularly for digital drawing, note-taking, setting reminders for daily tasks, taking photos, playing repetitive puzzle-based games to assist with focusing during meetings and when watching webinars, using Goblin Tools’ The Judge to read my written ‘tone’, and using Finch, a self-care app akin to a digital Tamagotchi.
The challenges
On the flip side, I acknowledge that there have been issues that have arisen with my screen use. One major barrier I continue to encounter is my difficulty in disengaging from online platforms to transition to other tasks. These issues are exacerbated if the activity is time-sensitive, results in a correct or incorrect rating, or involves a win-lose situation. This is likely related to my monotropic processing style and my tendency to become intensely immersed in an activity of interest. Coupled with my general time blindness, my asking for “just five more minutes” could quickly turn into four hours! To learn more about monotropism, please check out this article by Reframing Autism on the subject.
Another area that is a struggle for most people in online spaces is navigating negative information, evaluating whether the content is valid and reliable, and identifying when an online space is toxic. Being quite a literal and trusting person, it had to be explained to me that people are not always honest, both in-person and online. It was a difficult learning curve to discover that, even online and in Autistic-specific forums, I would still encounter negative interactions, misunderstandings, and confronting topics. Moreover, the written format does not allow for the same nuance and clarity, which means misinterpretations may occur regarding our tone. Interestingly, even the way we can interpret emojis can vary (Chen et al., 2024)!
Strategies to balance risks with benefits and support safe online engagement
There is not necessarily a one-size-fits-all recommendation or right way to address issues concerning screen use. As an adult, I am still reflecting on my own screen use and benefit from feedback from my support people and friends about this. The best way to learn about what screen use means for our children and young people is to involve them in discussions and any decisions made about their online engagement. This may look like having regular check-ins with your child and sharing any concerns or observations you may have in a non-judgmental way.
Your child also may enjoy involving you in their online world. This may include demonstrating a certain game’s mechanics, sharing a video related to their interests, or discussing topics raised in a group chat. You do not need to be a pro-gamer or YouTuber, but just expressing curiosity may provide opportunities for meaningful interactions and invite open conversations about our experiences participating in online spaces, including any issues that may arise.
As parents and caregivers, there is, furthermore, a responsibility to make decisions to support your children’s well-being that may not necessarily align with their expectations. In Alfie Kohn’s book Punished by Rewards, he advocates for being honest and upfront with your children about tasks that may be non-negotiable or not have any intrinsic value to complete. For example, as a child, I did not have the self-insight to understand potential contributors to increased dysregulation or frustration levels. It was helpful for my parent to explain that part of her role was to look out for my well-being, to care for my well-being by monitoring my overt responses rather than relying on providing recommendations as arbitrary rules.
I have found it useful to implement strategies to assist with time management and transitioning between activities. This has included utilising apps such as Forest (a digital visual timer) and Habitica (a game-based habit and productivity app) to track the amount of time spent on a certain activity. I have also automatically set my devices to reduce their blue light after a certain time in the evening. I love using my phone’s focus modes for different activities (e.g., Work, sleep, personal, fitness), some of which are programmed to turn on automatically if I open a certain application or arrive at a particular location.
Being part of a structured and supervised online social group with fellow Autistic and Neurodivergent people can also be enjoyable. In Australia, there are several organisations that offer these services: two examples being Next Level Collaboration and The I CAN Network. These groups enable us to connect with like-minded people who share similar interests, while being supported in a safe space with Neurodivergent mentors and professionals to facilitate and guide the sessions.
Finally, I would like to reassure parents and caregivers that, rather than the onus lying solely on them to support our children and young people, screen use will be a lifelong learning curve for all of us, and that we should be supporting each other as a community. If you are struggling to have these conversations with your children or feel you would benefit from additional input, it may be worthwhile to engage with a neurodiversity-affirming allied health professional, such as a speech pathologist, occupational therapist, or psychologist. Belongside Families also offer parent groups and supports for Autistic families, which you can learn more about here.
References
Chen, Y., Yang, X., Howman, H., & Filik, R. (2024). Individual differences in emoji comprehension: Gender, age, and culture. PloS One, 19(2), e0297379. https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0297379
Harrison, M., & Rowlings, J. (2025, March 21). How a gaming program is giving neurodivergent kids a power up. The University of Melbourne. How a gaming program is giving neurodivergent kids a power up | Pursuit by the University of Melbourne
van Asselt, A. (2026). Beyond screen time: a neurodiversity-affirmative research agenda for screen use in Autism. Autism in Adulthood. https://doi.org/10.1177/25739581261452097
About Shadia
Shadia is the proud owner and founder of Autism Actually Speech & Communication and enjoys presenting and consulting. Shadia is a Certified Practising Speech Pathologist (CPSP) and has completed a Bachelor of Speech Pathology (Honours) and a Cert IV in Animal Behaviour and Training. They have professional interests in autism, multimodal communication supports, and animal-assisted services. Shadia was formally identified with Autism at the age of three and ADHD at 23. As an Autistic person with experience accessing therapeutic supports, Shadia is passionate about sharing how to view Autism from a neurodiversity-affirming perspective.